Minneapolis: land of dance

I sensed a common theme running through my time in Minneapolis this past week. See if you can spot it:





Correct answer: ladies

idea of the century probably

I was just looking at this wonderful site that I found on Vvinni's blog (he is great. he is good. oh yes oh dear oh my.) and I came up with what might be the single most terrifying and also amazing idea in the long history of things you should make in your toaster but instead make in your microwave: The Hot Pocket Sammich. It is not just an Hot Pocket (which is bad enough by itself) but is instead two Hot Pockets with a sandwich in the middle. Like a normal sandwich but substitute bread for awful. I am going to create this monstrosity (tomorrow maybe?) and report back in full (disgusting) detail. With (disgusting) photos. A variance on The Hot Pocket Sammich is the Hot Pocketurger, a hamburger with Hot Pocket buns. This sounds delicious to my ears already. If the Sammich proves vaguely edible, I may try this.

Get Out the (Naked) Vote!

I just found out that it is illegal to electioneer within 100 ft of a polling place in Colorado. I think we all know what that means. Wear all your Obama or McCain or Nader or Barr (just kidding...no one will vote for Barr) t-shirts, underwear, and pants to the polling place, then when the people there tell you to remove your things, you get to vote naked! Or you could just forgo all of the above and just show up naked. Either way, GOTNV!

Sleeping

If I could get rid of one thing from my life, it would be sleeping. It takes up far too much time. I just took an afternoon nap that stretched into evening and now I have to go back to sleep. What has sleeping ever done for me besides doing some very important things for me? I don't really know what sleep does exactly. Is it necessary? I'm pretty sure scientists think it is, but I don't know if they have a grip on the way things are. What if we just tried really hard not to sleep? Would it work?

Oh my God, you guys. Apparently, I was completely wrong. Sleep is real, you guys. We need it. Or else we die. So I guess I will just go to sleep. I guess it is not all bad, because if it weren't for sleep, then dreaming wouldn't exist. Neither would sleeping disorders, which are very nice as well. And snoring. And sleep walking and talking, which are adorable. And peeing the bed. Also, beds would not exist if we did not sleep anymore. I think we need to petition for more sleep. Add your name if you agree with me on this. We can also petition for sleep to be added to the Constitution. Somewhere in the sentence about the pursuit of Happiness. I actually think that was the Declaration of Independence. So it should be added to that instead, just so Britain knows too. We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, plenty of Sleep on nice comfy beds with lots of pillows and warm warm blankets, and the pursuit of Happiness.

Intentions

My intentions for this blog are as follows:
1. I will post little things from my day, if I feel like it.
2. I will discuss ideas, thoughts, and random nonsense that pop into my head.
3. I will try to be correctgrammar-wise. No promises, because then I will have already failed you.
4. Funny things, you betcha*
5. Updates from my life, maybe? If anything interesting happens.
6. Can't think of anything else right now. This list is open to being amended, if ratified by a 2/3rds majority.
What do you** want from my blog?

*no bets
**everyone who reads this, so maybe .5 persons in the known universe, including me (yes I read my own blog)