Thursday, January 22, 2009

Fuck that!

The Mikel(blog) and I went to the Tim and Eric Awesome Tour, Great Job! last night at the Ogden. It was woooonderful. With bulges. So many. And new slang (you don't get to learn deeze because you 'ent cool enough to learn) and previews of season four. It was such a Quallity show, you probably should have been there. It was truly lovely. The night opened with a warm up act by DJ Douggpound, who told terrible jokes followed by techno remixes of said jokes. He was exquisite. Then Jim and Derrick themselves came out and did some really great diarrhea dances and showed some diarrhea videos. We weren't allowed to take pictures inside (which I was grateful for because there's always so many dicks at all the concerts with their cameras all the time, amIright?) so instead here is a very nice picture of Obama and a pup.


Great Job, Obama. you deserve the new puppy.

But that's not Quall because also I beat Mikhail's ass to the ground playing Spyro. He'll try to claim otherwise, but he knows I kicked his stupid little booty to the floor, son. My knowledge of dragons and fodder is limitless. 'Get about it, Mikhail.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

In which I ramble on about music

I just wrote a long thingy about the new Decemberists song ("The Rake's Song") I downloaded this morning from their website, but then I deleted it because it made me feel gross writing those things. I don't want to tell people what to think (yes, I realize this is the primary function of all blogs everywhere all the time). However, I will tell people what to do, so go download it from their website and then tell me what to think. I like being told what to think.

Also in music-y related news, I finally got Chad Vangaalen's Soft Airplane last night after being a long time admirer. He makes really nice songs and animations to go along with some of them. Here's "Molten Light" from said album:



If you like it, thou shouldst probably go check out his other videos. There isn't a huge amount, but there is enough, little one.

PS: I just taught myself half of a Cat Stevens song on my harmonica. I feel very accomplished, considering I really don't know how to play harmonica. I need to get better already.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

Suuuppppppper!

It was so beautiful out today! I tried out my new rock climbing shoes and played some really good harmonica at passing bicyclists. I've been much happier in the last few weeks than I can remember being for a long time. I'm not quite sure what the reason for it is, but it might be my brain sensing something new about to happen. Not so much new events as new ways of looking at and dealing with things. It is very nice! I'm sure I will post more about my new brain as it becomes adjusted to the new way of things.

Also, I just watched this and it made me pee myself from fright. Those gays are terrifying, dagnabbit. A.D. Miles, you are great!

Get the latest news satire and funny videos at 236.com.

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

To the Hobo that lives in my dumpster:

Please, live in another dumpster please. There aren't any nice things for you in there and you creep me out when I get home late at night with your loud breathing and rustling. I'm sorry you are a hobo, it must be really hard for you at this time of year but if you could just move to a dumpster that isn't on my driveway I would be very happy. I'm tired of sprinting into my garage.

Although, considering I haven't actually peeked over the top of my dumpster to look at you, you might not actually be a hobo. Here is a list of things you could be that are more horrifying than hobos:

An escaped rhino, waiting to kill my mom.
This is more terrifying because, obviously, I don't think you are trying to kill my mom. You are just trying to sleep and stay warm and maybe find some foodstuffs. But a parent-murdering rhino? Horrible. Get the intercourse out of my dumpster, rhino.

The Second Coming of Christ
I don't know why the second coming would be hiding in a dumpster in Fort Collins. Maybe this is a harbinger that the apocalypse will start in my yard. If you're in there, second coming, please find another place to hide for the next three years. My dumpster is not the best place for you to do that. If you come inside, we will make you tea.

Joseph Stalin
AHHHHHHHHHHHH GTFO, STALIN I MEAN IT RIGHT NOW YOU HEAR MEEE!

Necromorphs
Probably the worst possible thing that could be living in my dumpster. I don't even want to think about it. I will, however, be keeping a force gun in my car at all times from now on, just in cases. Also, hobo, if you feel some sort of zombie alien infection start to take hold of you, get as far away from my house as possible. There will be NO Necromorphs in my dumpster. NONE.


After some lengthy discourse with myself, I have decided you can stay in my dumpster, hobo. It will keep these other things from living there.

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Happy Benjamin Franklin Day!

Happy Benjamin Franklin Day Everyone!

And Happy Birthday, pep-pep!